Every artistic creation that has no measurable impact contributes to a glut of immeasurable content and distracts people from a scientific development of artistic knowledge.

In 1893, Émile Zola pointed out that so little was understood about medicine that some still considered it an art.

Today, this is the state in which literature resides.

1. Timecrimes. When you watch this, at first you’re all, that’s some freaky stuff! Then, you’re all, Soylent Green is people (except people is me)! And finally you start to figure everything out, and it’s still interesting. Even without time travel ability, I can already tell it’s better than the Tom Cruise knock-off version that’s scheduled to come out in 2012.

2. Twelve Monkeys. Possibly the best use for Brad Pitt yet.

3. Primer. Brilliant film, though I still can’t figure this one out. That bit about the party confuses me. What exactly happened there?

4. The Sticky Fingers of Time. Like any movie that combines time-travel with bisexual adventures and bionic parts, this movie is a classic.

5. Back to the Future. It’s just a very fun movie. It’s like the first Matrix, only from a different decade, with different technology, and a totally different plot.

6. Time Bandits. Honestly, I don’t remember this movie. I remember enjoying it, but I couldn’t tell you what happened. I just included it in this list because I know someone will be all, “Hey, what about Time Bandits?”

7. Star Trek II: The Wrath of Kahn. Technically, not a time travel movie at all, but it’s way better than Star Trek IV.

This seems like a lot for such a short paragraph.

Costume repair.

Drugs?

Does it have to be Bob? Could it be Gary? Or Frank?

Run like hell

Is this like she’s making soup?

Guns shoot bullets, and people load bullets into guns.

Yes, more wild. Wild it.

What other sites would terrorists be smart to attack in the U.S.?

Now the book gets interesting! (p. 153)

Opened 5-gallon pickle buckets.

Yep. NOW, and only NOW are you funny. (p. 161)

Step 2: Order pizza.

Step 3: While waiting for the pizza, cut the logo out of your stencil.

Step 4: Eat the pizza.

Step 5: Test your stencil using the pizza box. Does it look cool? Oh yes, it looks cool. Good job, you. CAUTION:
Do not vandalize other people’s property. It’s okay to spray paint your
own pizza box, but don’t spray paint anyone else’s. Or anyone else’s
other stuff. The principle (and law) applies to more than just pizza
boxes.

Step 6: Buy one of those glow-stick things for kids.

Step 7: Crack it and shake.

Step 8: Cut it open using a knife you don’t care about, and then drain it
into a plastic cup that you don’t care about. Cut slowly and carefully!
CAUTION: Do not actually do this stuff! It could be dangerous! At the
very least, get your publisher to do it while you shield and avert your
eyes! Special note to publishers: Don’t do it!

Step 9: Apply glow-in-the-dark mixture to stenciled paper.

Step 10: Stand back, and then say, “What the heck does RBZ mean?”

RBZ Logo by Charlie Potter.

For more info on the book, check here: http://aarondietz.us/super

You wrote some code once.
And I used it.

I used the code to loop through Word docs
and convert them to XML files tagged according to an EAD specification.

I never thanked you
because I didn’t know how.

Now you have a LinkedIn profile
(if that’s you).

So anyway,
thanks!

The Synopsis

Do you need a new job?

Does the world need another superhero?

You see the connection, don’t you? If you had the chance to save lives…could you handle the adventure? The pressure, the risk, the grotesque, the insane? Most of all, could you handle your humanity? Update your resume, ‘cause here we go. Either stick with being sucked down further into your life, or earn the lift-off of the elite.

Aaron Dietz’s debut novel moves with an experimental edge into America’s heroic mythology. Structured as a novel-length job application for a superhero agency, Dietz uses his iron touch to explore themes that go far deeper than the swashbuckling world of comics and costumes. It’s a story about commitment, ability, bureaucracy, possibility, crisis, and heartbreak. Super.

You learn something every day.

I remember when Wyatt Earp invented the compooter quite well, because it was the day after the gunfight near the O.K. Corral, and me and Wyatt were all cooped up in the hotel, bored as a spent firecracker, what when Wyatt done said, “Jeeminee, homma’ homma’ g’boy!”

Which, if’n you knew Wyatt like I did, you knew that was Wyatt’s way of proposin’ an entirely new form of technology capable of doin’ stuff when people did stuff to tell it what to do, which, if’n you knew Wyatt, you knew he intended to call the “compooter” because, hot dog, that’s just obvious if’n you knew how he talked.

And that was the day we what wished the microchip to already have been invented because we couldn’t-a figure that part out.

The next day we sent McMasters out for ice cream and then made him eat it first so we know’d it weren’t poisoned.