Top Time-Travel Movies of All Time

September 2nd, 2010 by aarondietz

This list is, of course, final. If you were thinking of making one of the best movies about time travel in the near future, you’re too late, unless it’s autobiographical. Because then you’d be a time traveler. So you could change time and stuff. Get it? Never mind.

1. Timecrimes. When you watch this, at first you’re all, that’s some freaky stuff! Then, you’re all, Soylent Green is people (except people is me)! And finally you start to figure everything out, and it’s still interesting. Even without time travel ability, I can already tell it’s better than the Tom Cruise knock-off version that’s scheduled to come out in 2012.

2. Twelve Monkeys. Possibly the best use for Brad Pitt yet.

3. Primer. Brilliant film, though I still can’t figure this one out. That bit about the party confuses me. What exactly happened there?

4. The Sticky Fingers of Time. Like any movie that combines time-travel with bisexual adventures and bionic parts, this movie is a classic.

5. Back to the Future. It’s just a very fun movie. It’s like the first Matrix, only from a different decade, with different technology, and a totally different plot.

6. Time Bandits. Honestly, I don’t remember this movie. I remember enjoying it, but I couldn’t tell you what happened. I just included it in this list because I know someone will be all, “Hey, what about Time Bandits?”

7. Star Trek II: The Wrath of Kahn. Technically, not a time travel movie at all, but it’s way better than Star Trek IV.

Ode to Chong Yit Seng

August 10th, 2010 by aarondietz

Chong Yit Seng
of Singapore,

You wrote some code once.
And I used it.

I used the code to loop through Word docs
and convert them to XML files tagged according to an EAD specification.

I never thanked you
because I didn’t know how.

Now you have a LinkedIn profile
(if that’s you).

So anyway,
thanks!

The Good Thing About People Behaving Like Sheep

July 7th, 2010 by aarondietz

Perhaps a comforting thought related to people being relatively easy to manipulate is that people can be heavily influenced by an idea, and so if the world seems too commercialized, too homogenized, or just too stupid due to a general lack of independent thought, then take heart in knowing that the right idea could easily catch on at any moment, and transform the world.

People Are Impressionable Jerks

June 28th, 2010 by aarondietz

I’ve always been kind of nice, so when I’m approaching the same street corner as someone else I tend to stop and let them go ahead, which seems to suit them fine, as they usually make no acknowledgement of my existence whatsoever.

This never surprises me, it being that people are selfish jerks and all.

But no! I’ve made a frightening discovery! Recently, I’ve changed jackets from a simple black pea coat to an attention-getting, weird (sort of Sgt. Pepper-y) jacket. Suddenly people wait for ME at street corners!

What a bunch of jerks! Being selfish and ignoring the existence of others is actually fairly reasonable behavior, seeing as how other people are also selfish jerks, but going out of your way just to treat others differently purely based on what they wear is another, far worse kind of idiocy!

What Do Recent Windows OS’s Need All that Memory/Processing For?

February 27th, 2010 by aarondietz

Recommended requirements for running Audacity:

Windows 98, ME: 128 MB RAM / 500 MHz

Windows 2000, XP: 512 MB/1 GHz

Windows Vista Home Basic: 2 GB / 1 GHz

Windows Vista Home Premium: 4 GB / 2 GHz

Mac: “Audacity runs best with at least 64 MB RAM and a 300 MHz processor.”

Sources: http://audacity.sourceforge.net/download/windows and http://audacity.sourceforge.net/download/beta_mac

Alternate title for this blog: “Planned obsolescence” applies to operating systems designed to require a completely new computer purchase.

Let’s play with Referendum 71!

October 20th, 2009 by aarondietz

Background: Referendum 71 is being voted on in Washington State. If passed, it will allow state-registered domestic partners to receive the same legal rights as those who are married, under Senate Bill 5688.

Statement of Partiality: I’m voting for approval of Referendum 71.

The Fun: Let’s look at Referendum 71’s statements for and against, straight out of the handy voter’s booklet from my mail!

Who Had the Best Headings? Statement For used three straightforward headings, all clear and concise: The Domestic Partnership Law Protects All Washington Families, What is Included in the Domestic Partnership Law?, and Who Supports the Law? Statement Against used four headings that relied on an anxious attack of exclamation-slanted prose (!) such as: Reject Senate Bill 5688 to Protect Children! and Reject Senate Bill 5688 to Preserve Marriage!

The Winner: I have nothing against exclamation points, but I prefer my voter “information” without blatant exciticism, so Statement For wins round one.

Who Used the Fewest Quotes? Statement For used one quoted segment for a summation statement in what appears to be an effort to let the reader know where an opinion has been expressed, as opposed to the otherwise factual information they were sharing. Statement Against quoted one state senator twice, and a representative once, and then put quotes around words like, “family unit,” “husband,” “wife,” and “gender neutral.”

The Winner: Statement Against could have shared any factual information it wanted to about the bill, but instead chose to give me three statements of opinion from state legislators. Then, they started talking about “husband” and “wife” and how the bill is going to redefine those words. Fact check: the bill doesn’t redefine them. It essentially says, “Hey, let’s treat some of these terms as though they are equal to any member in a domestic partnership or marriage instead of rewriting every single law using those words.” That quote was mine, and the winner of this round is Statement For.

Which Side Presents the Most / Best Facts? Statement For says this bill will allow domestic partners death benefits for partners of police and firefighters killed in the line of duty, the right to use to use sick leave to care for a seriously ill partner, pension benefits for partners of teachers and other public employees, victims’ rights, and more. Statement Against says “Marriage [...exists...] for the greater good of the social order,” and “Marriage is about providing the most stable and healthy environment in which to raise children,” and that this bill will “confuse children and likely result in public schools influencing children to accept a new definition of the ‘family unit’ so that same-sex partners will be a recognized norm.” Of course, I don’t understand how children would be confused if the definition of “family unit” was a recognized norm. It sounds like Statement Against is the one that’s a little confused. They’re obviously pro-marriage. And they also claim that this bill is “primarily about homosexual marriage.” According to Statement Against, this bill gets more people that much closer to marriage, so you’d think they’d be for it, since they’re all gung-ho about marriage being vital to the social order and all that.

The Winner: Anyway, come on, now. You know who the winner is. Statement Against wrote a very entertaining statement riddled with unsupported opinion and contradictory lines of thought. Statement For wrote a measured, level statement in support of a bill that should never have been challenged in the first place. Go Referendum 71!

How to Write Online

October 6th, 2009 by aarondietz

Short sentences are good. Short paragraphs are good, too. End them quickly.

Is Anyone Out There Actually Having a Windows 7 Launch Party?

October 1st, 2009 by aarondietz

Background: Microsoft’s Windows 7 promotion is centered around convincing people to host a Windows 7 launch party. You can find out more about that by watching this video and trying not to throw up.

Scary Observation: Supposedly, people are doing this. In fact, according to a regional Windows 7 launch party map, there are easily over 10,000 people hosting parties in the United States, alone.

Hypothesis #1: The number of parties is a highly fabricated number.

The Scant Evidence: As Windows XP pretty much made Vista obsolete, I’m having trouble believing there are that many people interested in Windows 7.

Hypothesis #2: A large number of the comments left on this page were actually left by Microsoft marketing personnel.

The Scant Evidence: There just aren’t enough typos on the comments page. I find it hard to believe that Windows fans have an higher-than-average rate of typing and grammatical accuracy.

The Request: If you are hosting a Windows 7 launch party or if you know someone who is, give me details! I want to know everything–like, why? Was it for the “party pack”? Do you love Windows? Was it an excuse to try out a new operating system so you figured, why not? I will respond with non-judgmental interest. I only want to know more.

DA SOCIALISTS HAEV SPR3AD THEYRE EVIL TRAFIC LITES 3V3RYWHARE

September 1st, 2009 by aarondietz

SO WOW LOK WUT I JUST FIND OUT SOCIALISM HAS FOUND ITS HOMA ON MILIONS OF STRET CORN3RS ACROS DA USA!11!!111 IN TEH FORM OF TRAFIC LIGHTS

Y3S!11!!! OMG LOL 3V3N THOUGH MANY US!!!!11! WTF CITIEZNS MAY NEV3R NED OR UES TRAFIC LIGHTS TH3Y PAY TAEXS TAHT SUPORT TH3M!!11!!!!

OMG THES KIND OF SOCIALIEZD WAY OF MAKNG SURE PEOPL3 R SAEF SI RIDICULOS

IMM!11!11 A P3D3STRANE Y SHUD I PAY FOR TRAFIC LIGHTS YO???!!?! OMG LOL

Okay, so the USA is not a nation of idiots

August 18th, 2009 by aarondietz

When the Obama administration dumped their support of the public health care option in an effort to move the current health care plan forward, I proposed that one of the following three things must be true:

1. The USA is a nation of idiots.
2. The USA’s Senators are pets of the health care industry lobby.
3. Both of the above.

But a poll run by a conservative research organization turned up the following results: 83% of U.S. citizens favor a public health care option.

Now I think it’s down to possibility number 2.

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